Tuesday, November 2, 2010

A Dose of Optimism and a Heap of Reality

I feel a bundle of emotion is about to burst out of me. I can't tell if it's good or bad or both, but I have this sense of excitement with an underlying wariness of it. Why? Because of school work. Strange, right? But I find it thrilling.

I'm debating whether or not I want to get my doctorate and I'm starting to get feedback on my research ideas. I feel vulnerable. What if I'm not cut out for this? What if I'm pedestrian? But what if this is what makes me happy? What if I found my niche? I probably shouldn't put so much emphasis on schoolwork, but I want to write something that's actually saying something and I think I'm willing to risk my ego to say it.

I'm such a nerd. And a coward. Because in writing this, I'm also super afraid I'm setting myself up for a disappointment. But what the heck? I want to be daring, even if it's just admitting that I like being a student.

2 comments:

anon said...

Just dance.

Mortensen Baby Farm said...

Kels! You can do anything!!!! I always thought this would be the route you would take! Go for it sista!!!! You are amazing and I just love ya to death!